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I’m just tired

I am spending 90% of my life unconscious in bed at the moment. That’s not the hard part. The hard part is when I have to be awake for short bursts with unending pain and confusion. Like now, in the middle of the night.

I take Ibuprofen to help reduce the head-pressure feeling, but it can’t touch the pain, and I end up causing a rebound headache if I overdo it. Codeine I only let myself take once a week for joints, and it makes headaches worse anyway. Rizatriptan causes guaranteed vomiting every time now so is pretty much useless.

My injections started wearing off in January barely a month after I had them, and as usual it’s got gradually worse until there is more migraine than not migraine. I’m hesitant to request injections again so soon because the doctor last time said there might not have been much point in continuing to give them to me. This terrifies me as somebody who faces living like this full time otherwise.

I understand his point of view; they seem to last less time for me than they do for other patients, and I’ve also started fainting when I get them so it’s just more hassle all around for everybody. But on the other hand, an animal would be mercifully put down if anyone found out it was feeling like this.

I’m waiting for news on surgeries so with any luck they will quite literally take something out of my head and solve a lot of my problems.

It snowed again.
The moon looked more interesting than this but the camera didn’t really pick it up.
I tidied up the bag dispensers. We really never need to bring home new carrier bags ever again.
We got a free mini Google Nest with a Spotify promotion. Not really sure what to do with it so far other than ask it the time and ask why Will farts.
Finally had to write down all the things I’m meant to be watching with Will. I’ve seen a lot of these before but I want to re-watch them with him. Don’t ask me why we started at season 5 of Law & Order.
The Expanse is a frustrating one because I was trying to get him to watch it in 2016 and he said it wasn’t his thing. This year someone else finally mentioned it and he decides he’s into it now ?.
I finally watched this, and, Jesus Christ. Corpse legs what done me a spoop.
This sound sensor officially betrayed me by telling me there was noise on the right side of the building and then never showing anything again. We never found that ghost.
Ugliest scream yet. Imagine being in this bed when you realised it was haunted by a guy who likes to stand on it.
Pickle visiting me in the night.



This is such fucking frustrating bullshit. If you think they need to take even more Jewish land (after they already took 80% to make Jordan) then you also can’t expect Jews to govern them and hand them everything. Make up your fucking mind. And, here’s the bonus: They don’t even think they need to be vaccinated because they literally said that COVID-19 was sent by Allah and would only kill Jews. 

Always fascinates me that they miss off 80% of the land on their maps of Palestine. Of course, they only care about the bit that has Jews living on it.

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