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My 3rd migraine Botox

I went to the hospital yesterday and had another dose of migraine Botox. I felt it wearing off around a month ago, meaning that I need to get doses every other month, as my previous one was in December.

My headaches were getting longer and more severe around February 18th, and things like nausea and visual aura were ramping back up (no idea how paralysing head muscles stops those things, but it’s fascinating). Then I realised I could move my eyebrows a lot! So, the Botox had worn off.

I always forget just how bad it is when it wears off. It’s just awful having that level of pain again, and everything that comes with it. I’ve been in bed so much, and I’ve had a horrible sleep cycle.

I still have a low-level headache (minimum) all the time but, hopefully, the Botox will take hold soon and I’ll feel blissful relief. I’m quite concerned about the possibility of it wearing off while I’m abroad.

The car journey was unfortunately very awful in terms of car sickness. As much as I want my own car, and no longer have the energy to cope with public transport and all it entails, I really do hate car journeys. I wish they didn’t make me feel ill, they never used to and it was awesome.

I have to use the rear camera on my phone to get much definition of where the needles went in, the front-facing camera seems to automatically blur the skin a bit. Using the rear camera on yourself is an inevitably wonky experience.

I think I bled a lot because I got dabbed on the forehead by an assistant a fair bit.
Big scab visible on the back of my shoulders this time. Jesus, that PCOS hair! I never realised I was quite so unattractive from this side.

I know it doesn’t look like I’m doing anything about my weight, but I am, unfortunately it takes longer to lose it then it does to gain it. I could eat nothing in a day and it still wouldn’t be the 3,000 calorie deficit from my TDEE required to lose 1lb. It takes a frustrating amount of time.

My beautiful babe.


Joop sticking his head deep in the cucumber.
Recent hair.
Sometimes I wonder if I’ll be in my curly hair transition forever. 
A twirl, and my currently terrible skin.

I recently got a Mia Tui Mini Jen to use as my personal item on the plane along with my hand luggage. It comes with a clear pouch, that I was hoping could serve as my liquids allowance bag, as that’s apparently what people like to use it for.

Unfortunately it just doesn’t fit things! It’s shorter on one measurement than a small freezer bag is (the things people normally use as the 20cm x 20cm liquids bags), and the nature of the clear vinyl unfortunately means it just can’t accommodate things very well.


Freezer bag fits more things and still has room for some other toiletries. I’ve got some 50% DEET as advised by my travel nurse.

I decided to use it as my bag for the hospital, because it can fit a lot of stuff in it and there is often a boring wait during this kind of appointment. It turns out that Mia Tui bags only stay organised if you keep them that way! I definitely made a mess of mine.

Still can’t put my magazine all the way back into the bottom because of how I left it yesterday.
Also, my water bottle is too tall to fit in the bag.

The bag is longer than my chair armrests, and I’ve not found a successful way to suspend it from them yet. I can’t bring it to Eurovision itself because they don’t allow large bags in the stadium for terrorism reasons, but I’ll almost definitely take it around Jerusalem with me, it can hold my walking stick and drinks and maps and whatnot. I just don’t want to be holding it on my lap the whole time.


Unfortunately, my laptop is pretty much dead. I’ve started having a lot of memory errors and crashes, I can only get it to stay on for longer than a few minutes by booting it in safe mode, which removes a lot of functions, like audio and the ability to turn down the dang brightness.

I reinstalled Windows (and unfortunately this lost me Windows Photo Viewer, as apparently it doesn’t come with Windows 10, and I only had it because I upgraded from Windows 8), I’ve done all sorts of troubleshooting and driver updating, you name it, I’ve tried it. The only solution I can’t try out is “adding more RAM” because I’ve got a laptop.


In fairness to this laptop, I’ve had it since 2014. It’s now 2019. Apparently you’re meant to replace laptops every 3 to 4 years, because the inner components just get worn out. I don’t blame this laptop for wearing out.

Replacing it is an expensive endeavour, though. This one looks like it would do the job, but obviously I can’t spend £245 in one go right now. Aside from it being more than half of my income, all of my disposable cash has to go towards my trip right now. I’ve paid Kadek my half of the flights but I still owe her for things like the apartment and concert tickets, it’s just gonna take a few months until I am not needing to buy anything else first. Oy.

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