The worst nail art the world has ever seen

Posted On August 4, 2017

Brace yourselves for I have tried an art so bad that the Lord Himself may need to intervene.

So, a while ago I saw a video going around Facebook, of some nail art being done. Lots of the examples featured stencils that you stick to your nails, paint over, and peel off, leaving a design behind. I was instantly entranced by the process, so I ordered a cheap pack of nail stencil foils and they eventually arrived.

Now I have tried them, and, uh, it did not go well.

20170803_202339 — First I picked out a pattern to try.

20170803_202424 — My slightly horrendous bare nails.

Fun fact, my nails used to be kept short, owing to the fact that I am very gay and also that I played the guitar as a teenager. I’m now trying to let them get a bit longer and see how it goes.

20170803_203400 — You peel off the outer frame of the design to get the actual stencil. You can use the remaining bits as nail stickers if you want, although with some designs this seems too fiddly to be worth it.

20170803_204414 — Apply a clear coat on top of base colour. Let it dry, obviously.

20170803_210130 — Stick the thing, do the paint, peel it off and . . .

20170803_210311 — Oh Christ that didn’t really work.

20170803_211320 — I suddenly remembered why the video I saw showed the stencils being moved around with a pair of tweezers and not the person’s fingers.

20170803_212741 — I also tried another design on my toenails and this went a bit better, perhaps because they had been dry since last week. (The design underneath is some horrendous stripes I attempted with masking tape before the stencils arrived)

20170804_083342 — And here are my finished nails.

I normally don’t care about excess varnish getting on my fingers, because I find that it usually flakes itself off overnight anyway. Something about working with stencils has made it all want to stay clinging onto my fingers though, as well as to anything I touched.

I’m not entirely certain where I went wrong. Maybe I glooped too much varnish on over the stencil and so it all ran together when I peeled it off? I did try less varnish on later nails though, and that didn’t fare much better. Maybe I didn’t stick the stencil down properly? It probably didn’t help that I reused it for each nail, even though you apparently shouldn’t, but as there are only two of each design in the pack I didn’t want to be wasteful. Maybe I just plain don’t have the knack for this!

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