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I’ve not been well recently. I’ve had a swollen neck and what’s felt like a noticeably smaller opening in my throat. I’ve been able to feel the roof of my mouth, my limbs hurt, my head felt thick and heavy, swallowing drink is still painful but thankfully not as difficult as it was. Breathing even got difficult because of how thick and weird the back of my mouth got, but thankfully that has reduced down a bit.

The last time I felt this feeling in my neck, I had glandular fever. Which I apparently got from starting to date Will, as he’d had it years earlier. I couldn’t eat, I was vomiting up the water I drank, and eventually I couldn’t swallow water at all because my throat swelled so much. That’s when I was admitted to hospital late at night and put on IV hydration.

In retrospect, the vomiting was almost definitely down to the fact that I’d been given penicillin; the GP tried me on both tablet and liquid form, and then in the hospital I was on it intravenously at first. Then they were like, “Oh, turns out you’re allergic to penicillin LOL MY BAD.”

And I haven’t been vomiting this time around, and maybe I wouldn’t, if it was the penicillin’s fault and not a general glandular fever thing. But I’ve had a lot of the other stuff, and with this particular neck feeling, I’d worry that I had it again, if I hadn’t been told that wasn’t possible.

Apparently you always carry it (and pass it on to new people that you kiss, awkward) but you don’t get the symptoms again. So, I guess I can’t have glandular fever right now. But I have a fever of some sort and it makes me feel utterly grim.

Like, I have chronic fatigue along with everything else going on, but this current illness makes me feel SO much more sluggish than I do even normally and it’s a real nightmare getting anything done.

I emptied the kitchen bin the other day, and it took me two whole days to have the energy to put a new bag in the bin. TWO DAYS.

It’s just awful right now really. That, and I have a lot of charity-related mental stress. Things are smoother now that the police stepped in, but there’s loads of bureaucratic stuff in the way. Usually in other people’s online systems not working when I’m trying to sign up the charity. This should finally work, after two weeks of trying. But who knows.

I am finally able to log in to the charity’s bank online, two weeks after opening the account, and I can’t even do anything with it because apparently I should have received a fancy USB cardreader that lets me do stuff. I do not have this thing.

Stuff like that is all piling up and driving me slowly insane.

I applied to a batch of grants but I won’t hear about them until November. I have an urgent application from somebody who has seizures almost every day, has broken both arms and also their spine on different occasions while having seizures, it’s really serious so I’ve got to be able to kit this person out with a lead sleeve, get clickers in, find travel fare to get to their house, so on and so forth. I can’t wait until November to find out if we’re getting any grant money.

In desperation I’ve created a Crowdfunder page which currently isn’t live, as I’ve got to upload a video about the charity to the top of the page. Which involves MAKING a video first!

Here’s a spider that was gross.

Pencil case of useful stuff.

Freya was super into this stamp.

Hi I’m Freya and i like to sit like an orangutan.

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