Cardigan love

I mentioned a while ago that I thought an emerald cardigan was a good move towards finding “my style.” Well I also got one, the other week. And I really like it! I don’t know how much you can say about a cardigan really. It’s comfy, it’s baggy, it’s got a bit of cable knit going on. It’s a nice colour and it’s, a cardigan.

Excuse my hair, it needs urgent relaxing.

Pockets.

I’m not sure what this plant is, but it’s been getting a bit damaged in the wind. It will probably look nice in the summer too but these are two separate thoughts.

A vine that is more successful than the ones Will and I were growing in pots.

Isador has dino eyes.

This is her rear foot against her nose.

May have roped myself into making the leads for applicants myself. Will need to apply for a grant first though because sewing machines are expensive!

I actually went out of the house with my new wheelchair yesterday, it was meant to be a nice trip to the Common with Will and Freya.
There was a little ridge in the pavement not far from the front door. The chair cut out. The lights went from the controller and the power button wouldn’t respond. Will had to lift the batteries out and back in for it to turn on again. And it repeated. Had to go on the manual setting, get pushed past the tiny inconsequential ridge, try again. The ride was actually very smooth, when the chair was working. Any bumps, ridges, otherwise bad pavements, or going up or down kerbs, and the chair cut out again.

I got to the crossing at the top of the road and the chair cut out multiple times while there were cars waiting for me to move. It was pretty damn distressing. The whole of that road is in very bad condition (with the exception of one end, which they seemingly decided to renovate and then stop), so I knew it would be a nightmare to try and get much further. I said I wanted to go home.

Going back into the road, my chair cut out again in front of another queue of cars.

I had a lot of worries and I honestly felt heartbroken. I felt worried that the chair couldn’t cope with being outside, despite the leaflet saying otherwise and showing it on grass. I know it won’t be as powerful as Calpurnia, but I shouldn’t need something so gigantic to get around in the city. I worried that the motors can’t hope with the steepness of our road, which is the minimum thing that I need it to do in order to leave my house.

I wondered if I’m just so fat that I made a wheelchair unable to cope with a ridge in a pavement. I am really down about my weight. A taller person would probably look OK, but I’m only 4’11” so I really pudge-out.
I actually restrict my eating a lot more than you’d think, and I take a dangerous weight-loss drug on alternating weeks, it speeds up metabolism so much that it’s killed people, but I’m not losing anything.
I lost four stone once by eating 140 calories a day in soup, and it still took a really long time to happen. Then it all came back.
I might have some severe hormone issues going on, but I won’t know the situation until I’ve finally managed to see my nurse about the blood tests I had.

A friend on Facebook had a similar experience with their wheelchair, and apparently the culprit is battery failure. This makes sense, as initially the batteries ran down after using the chair to get across the dining room a few times, so I’ve been using it on the manual setting indoors since.
Will is going to ring Sasaki today, and hopefully they will replace the batteries. If not, or if the same thing happens again, I won’t be able to keep the chair. I can’t spend years paying off £3,000 for something I can’t even use.

Planted some varieties of sunflower for the summer.

Dog love.

I’ve started watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine and I am in love.

As soon as she came on screen I realised that she is my type. And I don’t know why it took me so long to figure out what my type was.

I don’t think I’ve mentioned sexuality on this blog yet. I am basically 99.9% gay. I am only very rarely attracted to men. It just so happens that Will is that rare man, we’ve been together 5½ years and have built a life together.

But anyway, beforehand I couldn’t figure out what pieced together all the women I am attracted to. Suddenly I realised. Long/ oval face shape, dark hair, dark eyes, vaguely threatening demeanour. That is literally the type of woman I go for. It doesn’t explain why I fancy Gillian Anderson. But I suppose everyone has exceptions.

It definitely explains why I was so hung-up on my darkly-featured, very angry ex-girlfriend.

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